When He's Not So Perfect After All

He's the love of your life. After all those years of yearning and finding the one, he comes in like a breath of fresh air. You decide that here is the perfect partner, your soul mate.

Then he belches. He forgets to shave most days. He sniffs his socks to see if he can use them again without washing. He forgets to pick up the laundry or mail the checks. He does not ask for directions when he's well beyond being lost. He's not so perfect after all.

Chances are you've tried to train him to dress better, eat better, act better. But the quirks and the habits still persist. Here's the thing: that's just the way he is. If you think you can change him, especially deep-seated habits, think again. You're bound for frustration. And many relationships fail because of one partner trying mold the other into someone else.

Love is a four-letter word, and for relationships to work, you need to understand other four-letter word: GIVE. This means giving your boyfriend or husband some slack. It means being patient and forgiving. Remember, you have your own little annoying quirks too.

When a quirk comes up, here are a few things you can do:
1.Don't nag. Say it once nicely. Remind him gently -but not too soon after.

2.Don't roll your eyes. Never say "I told you so." Learn to smile and ask him what's next. Go with it. No doubt he has a plan and he needs your support.

3.Tell him sweetly that you don't like it when he does that particular thing. Then follow up immediately with something he does that you particularly like. You'll be surprised to know that he'll ask your advice on how to be better.