Improving a loving relationship using Feng Shui Tips

Even the best relationships can become a little stale over time. One day lovers wake up and realize the spark died down somewhere along the way. Maybe there is not enough passion or intimacy, or maybe the relationship just feels routine after all these years. The Chinese believe that there is more at work in this situation than just length of the relationship. They teach that there are eight areas our lives, each of which is affected by our environment. The art of promoting the flow of positive energy into every aspect of life is called Feng Shui. For couples that have lost the spice in their love lives, some redecorating with the help of this ancient art promises to improve the relationship.

The Bagua Wheel

In Feng Shui, a tool called the Bagua Wheel (ba =eight, gua = area) is used to locate the eight areas of life. For example, the Chien gua is for travel and helpful friends, the Kan gua is for social contacts, and the Kun gua is for relationships. Each section is associated with different colors and elements, which can be incorporated into the area to attract certain types of chi or energy. If these things are lacking, in the Kun gua for instance, it is believed that a person’s relationships will suffer. However, lovers can make an effort to add colors like pink, red, and white into the Kun gua of their home, along with including earth and fire elements. This will fill their home with “love chi,” thus improving their relationship.

All of these concepts seem a bit strange to the western world, which sees home decor simply as a means of pleasing the eyes. More importantly, many people think it is far too complicated to rearrange everything, especially at the suggestion of some mystical Chinese interior decorator. For the skeptical, let me point out that there is a practical side to Feng Shui. You can simplify the concept down to setting aside places in your home, each with their own distinct purpose. For example, the back right corner of the home is the love corner, and this is an ideal place to put your master bedroom. In the room where all the magic happens (or does not, if you are reading this), the back right corner from the door is also the love corner. This is where you should focus your redesigning energies, which makes sense considering that the bedroom is a couple’s sanctuary.

Start by analyzing the mood of the bedroom. If it is part sleeping place, part workout room, and part TV room, you are missing the point. Even those not associated with Feng Shui agree that the bedroom if for two things: sleeping and intimacy. If you watch the late show in bed or work on the computer here, you are drawing the wrong kinds of chi into the space. That is not to say that you cannot have these items, but you should give everything its own space so that one type of energy will not inhibit another. No relationship will prosper if it has the energy of work or casual entertainment instead of passion. Along these same lines, your bedroom is not the place to have pictures of your mom and dad, the kids, or anything else that squelches a romantic mood. Decorate with pictures of the two of you or paired animals or flowers. Anything that emulates happy life-long couples should have a home in your bedroom.

Beyond this, think of creative ways to incorporate the colors and elements of the Kun gua into the room. Although men may object initially, red, pink, and white are the colors of love. Even if you think Feng Shui is a load of nonsense, you are sure to feel romantic surrounded by these distinctly Valentine’s Day colors. Hearts have the same meaning to the Chinese as western cultures: love. Whether you choose heart-shaped pillows, picture frames, or candles, they are sure to dray love chi. Another perk of candles is that they bring the fire element into the space, a symbol of passionate desire. Set them up in the southwest corner of your bedroom, along with other items that symbolize your love, and wait your the relationship to ignite.

Certain items have special significance in Feng Shui. For instance, a wooden headboard symbolizes support in the relationship and incorporates the earth element. Anything that reflects light into the room is considered a pathway for chi, but rose quartz is the stone of lovers. Speaking of reflecting, keep mirrors out of the room. Some say that this creates a third party in the relationship, either in the form of a lover, a jealous friend, or a disapproving family member. Others believe that the soul gets up and strolls around the night, creepy as the thought is. They say that if it sees its reflection it will become frightened, and that could cause you to have bad sleep. Either way, you would do your love chi more good by covering or removing mirrors.

It is considered bad chi to point the foot of your bed at the door, as it is associated with being carried out by your feet. Instead, try placing the bed indirectly across from the door --but not under a window -- so that neither side faces the wall. Finally, prepare the space for romance, laying out amorous items in case they are needed. Pull out your finest red silk sheets, bon bons, and massage oil so that you and your partner will both feel that going to bed every night is a special occasion.

To the cynic, Feng Shui may sound like nothing more than superstition. However, both its enduring popularity and its practicality make it hard to be doubtful. It makes perfect sense, after all, that people will be happier living in a well-arranged environment. Feng Shui experts have made a study of design for thousands of years, paying attention to which layouts promote harmony in life. Even if they do not know more than the rest of us about love, they probably cannot know much less. If nothing else, the efforts you make to revive your love life will inspire your partner to do the same.