Feb 21, 2009

How To Stop Loving Someone Not Worthy

Needing to understand why you continue to love someone not worthy of your love is difficult, but it can be a life-altering change if you simply get some new perspectives – and that is exactly what I did recently in which I succeeded almost overnight to rid my feelings of someone who was dangling with my emotions like no one had done previously.

To begin with, I was left standing (figuratively) on the side of a dusty road without any water to drink to simmer about the status of my relationship. You see, the guy left the country (literally) and was to return in two months. During this period of being apart from one another, we were to take some space and see if this ‘relationship’ was what we really wanted.

One day his photos would be in my bedroom, and the next day I would take them out. I was really struggling, seething inside and crying – and finally I had hit the wall and realized I had been so distraught, unable to concentrate on school, work or even life without this all-consuming feeling of dread in regards to this failing relationship, that I had even considered to contact my Doctor in giving a prescription for an anti-anxiety medication. I realized I couldn’t stop loving him and really wanted to stop loving him, but I did not know how. I learned a valuable lesson that day when I had my breakthrough – Google is really good for finding anything you need to do.

After I realized I had spent so much valuable energy wasting my thoughts about the jerk, I Googled “how do you stop loving someone” into my browser and spent a total of three hours reading so many other people’s posts, threads, and comments on how they got over their ‘jerk’, I basically was immediately cured of my love sickness. I enjoyed reading some of the more funny comments such as, ‘I get over them with a shot gun’ or ‘I went and slept with his best friend and we are still together now’ – you get the idea. The world is your oyster, and by learning of other people’s similar issues, you realize you are not alone in your struggles. And yes, it does take time to get over someone not worthy, but my recent Google search gave me instant satisfaction and cured me immediately.

My life got back on track; I started seeing my friends, eating better, getting exercise, etc. I was strong enough so that when he finally sent me a Dear Jane letter by email, I had very little feelings except for some small amount of anger in that he would be such a coward not having the balls to tell me this in person. But that has since diminished too, since I got ‘back’ by writing and publishing a post about it.

I highly recommend doing a Google Search on “How Do You Stop Loving Someone” before you go off and sleep with any of his friends (that would not be very Divaliscious of you) nor using a shot gun – (Divaliscious is not into violence) and that can get you into serious trouble.

All in all, time really does heal the aching heart, and as time went by for me, a list started growing in my head of all the things I couldn’t stand about the guy which I had seemingly simply overlooked because of this ‘love’ for him I had. I will not share the list with you, but Girls….and Guys….with each relationship, you learn what you can and cannot accept about someone, you learn what you need and don’t need – and though there really is never someone who is a 100% perfect match, it takes two to tango, it takes two to compromise and it takes two aspirin to make you feel better quickly after a night out with your friends after you have danced the night away like no one was watching.

Keeping busy, getting on with your life and getting involved in your own life will help bring that new special person into your life sooner than you know it. Good luck, and let me know how you ‘dealt’ with your loving issues.
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