Feb 1, 2009

Preserving family recipes

Does anyone really know what their ancestors were eating two hundred years ago? Of course the history books tell us what famous people consumed, like Queen Elizabeth's infamous pastry tarts. But most of us have few ideas about what our great-grandparents ate or how their food was prepared. Perhaps they were too busy to write down this information or maybe they didn't have paper to preserve it.

Nowadays we have the means and perhaps the time to save family recipes and food favorites. It's just a matter of getting organized and choosing a format:

1. Put out a call for all the old family recipes that any of your relatives might still have. If they don't want to hand over the originals, ask for a copy that can be mailed, faxed, or electronically submitted. Suggest places where they might look for these, such as old cookbooks that have been handed down a generation or two, tucked into family Bibles, buried in boxes of records or documents, or clustered with yellowing family photographs.

2. As you receive the recipes, add missing information or details. For example, if one is named "Aunt Martha's Lemon Pie," add her surname in parentheses or on the back of the recipe. Find photographs or family anecdotes recorded in diaries or letters that can link food items to other facts about long-gone relatives.

3. Organize the recipes in a meaningful way. For example, you may want to separate maternal from paternal relatives. Then you could arrange recipes by food groups, such as main dishes, side dishes, desserts, beverages, and so on. Add a line of description about the cook or a quote from a letter or other document, which helps to personalize the recipe.

4. Arrange your information in a preservable format. For example, you may want to prepare one page per person, or several pages, depending on how much material you have. A photograph, favorite or well-known recipe, and a quote can fill a page in an attractive way that can be assembled in scrapbook or photo album format. You can then alphabetize names or choose another organizational style that will you, and anyone who views the information, to distinguish relatives from each other in some fashion.

5. Publish the information or excerpts from it. Pass around your scrapbook at the next family reunion. Get bound copies of your collection made as gifts for family members. Some cookbook companies will publish attractive home style volumes for medium-sized groups, which might be the size of your extended family. You can also print excerpts like one page at a time in a family newsletter or post the material to a family Website. Contact the local library's folk history section to see if they might like a copy for that shelf.

Your family's longstanding recipes may not seem important, but they hold a special place in history as well as in many relatives' hearts. Start collecting and preserving them today so that you can enjoy them tomorrow and always. Your children and grandchildren will thank you, and they may start asking for your favorite recipes.
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Get a Girl to Like You Within Seconds

Sad but true that women do not take a lot of time to either like you or dismiss you. So you must know how to get a girl to like you within seconds! When you start the conversation, first thing that women notice is how relaxed and composed you are. If you appear clumsy then she instantly forms an impression of a weak personality in you and that is disadvantageous. 3 ways that can help you get a girl to like you within seconds are....

Be confident of taking decisions-
Women do not prefer such guys who generally look for their consent on every matter. From the beginning you have to prove that you are capable of taking decisions and very strong willed. If they see that you are trying hard to make an impression then you will be written off. So it's important that you show your worth by displaying your inner strength. Surprise the woman and do not make it drab by waiting for her approval in silly matters.

Stay equally cool with her friends-
If you like her and want her to like you, make sure that she feels the urgency. So give equal attention to her friends, this will make her feel that she is just another girl over there. When you do this, her ego will be hurt and then she will try getting more attention from you. Yes, now you see how easily she will like you in seconds.

Do not show a lot of interest-
Well this might sound funny but guys, this works a great deal. So plan it this way, show you do not have that much interest in her. She would act pricey if you simply follow her and show her that you need her badly. Usually girls are scared and irritated if you stalk them, ruining your chances of getting her to be interested in you. This will spark general interest and she will like you instantly.
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Ask a Girl Out Without Ever Being Rejected - A Stunning Formula Which is Proven to Work

You could be planning to ask a girl out on a date, but at the same time also quivering with fear at the thought that she might reject your proposal. In such a situation it pays to take suitable action to eliminate the chance of getting rejected. Read these 3 tips on how to ask a girl out without being rejected and use them to attain success....

Tip No.1 - Set the stage.
Even if you are totally besotted by the girl of your dreams, it will not pay to ask her name and then directly ask her out. Instead, set up a firm stage before you pop the question. Use humor and charm to make her comfortable in your presence. Exchange small talk and ideas to find out her likes and dislikes and observe her body language to find out if she would be receptive to the idea of a date.

Tip No.2 - Keep it casual.
Do not prepare your question as if you are asking her hand for marriage. Instead keep it casual and try to slide it in your regular conversation so as to catch her off-guard. She will not have much time to refuse your offer and if she is genuinely interested in you then she will have no problem in answering positively. Remain confident and do not indicate that you are nervous since that might just make her edgy and spook her off.

Tip No.3 - Paint her a mental picture.
Indicate to the girl as to how you would normally enjoy a date after prying out her likes. If she is into outdoor adventure then promise her a date while trekking on a mountain or if she loves movies then tell her that you have 2 tickets for her favorite movie. Once she understands that you have custom-made a date especially for her, she will be more than happy to say yes.

These 3 tips will prepare you for your date and by studying your girl's tastes before popping the question, you will surely succeed in getting only a positive answer from her.
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Reasons for divorce

Choosing to get a divorce is not always an easy decision for either party. Sometimes there is a very good reason to get the divorce and other times, the two people have just grown apart and no longer wish to be together. Whatever the reason, the couple can expect to state such reasons at some point along the process. There are really two types of divorces, which are no fault divorces and fault divorces.

No fault divorces are available in all states now. This basically means that neither party has to have a good reason to divorce. As long as one of the two parties wants the divorce, it will most likely be granted. Proving fault is not the burden of either side. In all states, the person requesting the divorce needs only to put irreconcilable differences or the like as the reason for divorce. Some states do require that the couple be living separately for a certain period of time prior to allowing them to file for divorce.

In 15 US states, no fault divorces are the only option. There is no way for the party requesting the divorce to state any fault other than irreconcilable differences as the reason. Infidelity and other issues are not taken into consideration in the divorce cases in these states. There are, however, 35 other states where if there are grounds for divorce other than irreconcilable differences, the wronged party can use these in his or her case.

One of these reasons is adultery. This means that one or both of the parties has been unfaithful. They have sought out a relationship outside of their own marriage. Committing adultery can be very hurtful and very few couples are able to work through something of this magnitude.

Cruelty is another big reason. This would involve abuses of many types. Physical abuse is the most common one. Emotional and verbal abuse is also pretty common although people in these types of relationships do not always consider this to be abuse and put up with it for much longer than physical abuses. Sexual abuse also falls under this category. Many people feel that sexual abuse can not take place within a marriage, but it can happen there just as easily as in any other type of situation. Cruelty is the most commonly used grounds stated for divorce.

Abandonment is another ground for divorce. This usually requires the passage of a certain amount of time. If the spouse leaves and does not return in the allotted amount of time, then the remaining partner has grounds to file for divorce. Likewise, if the other party is imprisoned for a certain period of time, this same thing applies. A person should not be required to remain tied down to someone who is not there.

One final ground is the inability to engage in sexual intercourse with the assumption that this was not disclosed prior to marriage. For instance, a person can not expect to marry someone who can not engage in sexual intercourse and then years down the road decide that they can not deal with it anymore and then use it as grounds for divorce. On the other hand, if they were not told by the other party that this was an issue and found out after the marriage, then this would be able to be used as grounds.

Choosing to divorce a person should be based on something that isn’t going quite right. You do not need to have a specific reason at all to request a divorce, but most states do have the option of using one of the grounds for divorce as your reason. Having one of these reasons can help your case, but if the two of you are not happy, then a no fault divorce would be the way to go. You are both on level ground and can go your separate ways without your record being tarnished.
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What to tell friends and famililies when your marriage fizzles

If the path to divorce unfolds before you, there will be many details to attend to and people to inform. Friends and family members who perhaps attended your wedding may be sad or disappointed to hear about the impending divorce. Here are a few ideas for sharing the news.

1. Keep it low key. While some ex-spouses throw a party or send announcements with the news of their new post-marital status, it may be prudent to take a subtle approach. If anyone asks in the period leading up to a divorce decision, you can always say something like, "John and I are struggling through some difficult challenges. I'll let you know how it turns out." Once the decision has been made, however, your response will differ: "John and I have agreed to divorce. It's a difficult decision, and we are trying to resolve our disputes in civil fashion."

2. Avoid blaming your ex-spouse. Even if the other person is more to blame, you may want to take the higher road of character and simply say, "Unfortunately, we could not reconcile our differences. We hope to maintain a civil working relationship for the children (or until the property has been divided)." Of course, people who are especially close may know more of the truth, and you may discuss the circumstances more frankly. But for general information purposes, a neutral tone and objective facts are the safest and noblest route.

3. For special relationships, you may want to invite a friend or relative over for dinner or coffee and make a private announcement away from others. A quiet setting away from distractions or eaves droppers will provide opportunities for questions or discussion.

4. Be sensitive with former in-laws or your ex-spouse's friends. Using emotionless language places emphasis on the facts rather than details. This will help everyone accept the news quickly and without blaming either partner.

5. Tell your ex what you plan to do. You may want to rehearse a sentence or two in advance of telling anyone. Let your ex-spouse know of your plans so that adjustments can be made if necessary. For example, instead of saying "Our divorce is final in November; I'm not sure what John's plans are," you can say this: "Our divorce is final in November; John mentions moving to Harrisburg next spring." Of course, the "announcement" will depend in part on your relationship with an ex-mate and the information that both of you are willing to share about the other.

6. Make it simple. Follow the old adage, "Least said, soonest mended." Don't go on and on about the damaged relationship or your poor opinion of an ex-mate, which can leave hearers feeling uncomfortable or awkward. Focus on your personal need for self-improvement or hopes for the future.

While divorce can claim a family as victims, the circle need not extend to extended family or friends. Respectfully informing them of your new or expected status will prepare people as to future invitations or addressing holiday mail. Letting others know of your changed marital standing should be a courtesy, not a burden.
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