Nov 30, 2008

How to Survive Long Distance Love

Is it possible to survive a long distance relationship? Are there specific rules to follow in knowing how to survive long distance love? Is it possible to transcend the loneliness brought on by being apart and feelings of paranoia because of the distance?

How do couples do it? How do military husbands and wives accept their fate and continue to trust and abide by their bonds of matrimony? How does a college student manage the separation and balance the every day commitments schooling requests?

A long distance relationship, a long distance love can work and work well. Fidelity as opposed to infidelity is a true possibility when a separation has occurred. Trust is one of the most important factors involved in long distance relationships. It is a foundation that is built in the beginning of any love commitment, and one that needs to be continually reinforced.

One of the real challenges facing the many miles that exist between you and your partner is being able to create, and maintain the concept of being a couple in your daily life. When you are physically close it is easy to share yourself with the love of your life; to talk or to cuddle. When life gets you down and you have had a bad day, ever felt like just a hug would make everything much more bearable?

With distance between you and your hug, you are forced to find replacements for this form of reassurance. In order to bridge the distance you must have mutual feelings of faith and trust in your long distance love. Love comes together with commitment and stays together with trust and communication.

Long distance relationships bring on feelings of insecurity, of anxiety over the basic need of romance. The importance of keeping intimacy strong in your relationship should not be overlooked. To accomplish this one must develop good strong and effective communication skills.

The hardships one must bear in any long distance love are not unsurpassable. Have patience with your partner and yourself. Believe that one day your circumstances will improve to that point in time when all of the pain and suffering will only be a distant memory.

Can you survive a long distance relationship, a long distance love? Yes. Can it work? Yes. It Does. It can. Create trust, communicate effectively and it will work.
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Why Men Cheat ???

Counselor M. Gary Neuman surveyed 200 cheating and noncheating husbands to get at the real reasons behind men's infidelity.

Team up on your to-do list:What makes men cheat? Marriage counselor M. Gary Neuman dug through past research on male infidelity and found that most answers came from the wife's point of view. Wouldn't it make more sense to ask the guys? he thought. So for his new book, The Truth About Cheating, Neuman surveyed 200 cheating and noncheating husbands to get at the real reasons behind men's infidelity - including what cheating men say could have prevented them from straying. Here, some of his findings:

48% of men rated emotional dissatisfaction as the primary reason they cheated.
So much for the myth that for men, cheating is all about sex: Only 8 percent of men said that sexual dissatisfaction was the main factor in their infidelity. "Our culture tells us that all men need to be happy is sex," Neuman says. "But men are emotionally driven beings too. They want their wives to show them that they're appreciated, and they want women to understand how hard they're trying to get things right." The problem is that men are less likely than women to express these feelings, so you won't always know when your guy is in need of a little affirmation. "Most men consider it unmanly to ask for a pat on the back, which is why their emotional needs are often overlooked," Neuman says. "But you can create a marital culture of appreciation and thoughtfulness - and once you set the tone, he's likely to match it."

66% of cheating men report feeling guilt during the affair.
The implications are a little scary: It isn't just uncaring jerks who cheat. In fact, 68 percent of cheaters never dreamed they'd be unfaithful, and almost all of them wished they hadn't done it, Neuman says. Clearly, guilt isn't enough to stop a man from cheating. "Men are good at compartmentalizing feelings," Neuman explains. "They can hold on to their emotions and deal with them later." So even if your husband swears he would never cheat, don't assume it can't happen. It's important for both of you to take steps toward creating the marriage you want.

77% of cheating men have a good friend who cheated.
Hanging around friends who stray makes cheating seem normal and legitimizes it as a possibility. The message he's subconsciously telling himself: My friend is a good guy who happens to be cheating on his wife. I guess even the best of us do it. You can't simply ban your husband from hanging out with Mr. Wandering Eyes, Neuman says, but you can request that they spend their time together in an environment that offers less temptation, like at a sporting event or a restaurant for lunch rather than at a bar or club. Another strategy: Build your social circle around happily married couples that share your values - it'll create an environment that supports marriage.

40% of cheating men met the other woman at work.
"Oftentimes the woman he cheats with at the office is someone who praises him, looks up to him, and compliments his efforts," Neuman says. "That's another reason why it's so critical that he feel valued at home." Luckily, there's a clear warning sign that your husband is getting a little too cozy with a colleague: If he praises or mentions the name of a female coworker more than he would a male counterpart, your antennae should go up - and it's time for the two of you to set boundaries about what is and isn't okay at work, Neuman says. Is it acceptable for him to work late if it's only him and her? Can they travel together to conferences? Have dinners out to discuss a project? Ask him what he'd feel comfortable with you doing with a male colleague.

Only 12% of cheating men said their mistress was more physically attractive than their wife.
In other words, a man doesn't stray because he thinks he'll get better sex with a better-looking body. "In most cases, he's cheating to fill an emotional void," Neuman says. "He feels a connection with the other woman, and sex comes along for the ride." If you're worried about infidelity, focus on making your relationship more loving and connected, not on getting your body just right or mastering new sexual positions. (But know that sex does matter - it's one of the key ways your guy expresses his love and feels close to you, so be sure to keep it a priority.)

Only 6% of cheating men had sex with a woman after meeting her that same day or night.
Actually, 73 percent of men got to know the other woman for more than a month before they cheated. This means that you may have time to see the warning signs before infidelity occurs - you might even see it coming before he does. Keep an eye out for these common signals: He spends more time away from home, stops asking for sex, picks fights more frequently, or avoids your calls. Your gut reaction may be to confront him, but most men will deny even thinking about cheating - especially if nothing physical has occurred yet. Instead, Neuman suggests, take charge of what you can control - your own behavior - and take the lead in bringing your marriage to a better place. Don't hesitate to show your appreciation for him, prioritize time together, and initiate sex more. Give him a reason to keep you at the front of his mind, Neuman says. And be open about how you feel about what's going on between the two of you (again, without mentioning any third parties). Try, "I think we've started to lose something important in our marriage, and I don't want it to disappear." In the meantime, commit to keeping tabs on your relationship and doing what it takes to keep it working for you.
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Nov 28, 2008

Five Reasons to get married and Five Reasons not to get married

Getting married is once in a lifetime decision for many people. When people wish to get married, invariably all of them expect a full life together. Very few would think of marriage as a short-term exercise. Hence, it is very much necessary that all aspects of a life together be fully analyzed before tying the knot. Usually men and women tend to have different perspectives about married life. It would be better to have open and honest discussion to sort out the possible future irritants or at least understand them so that some sort of compromise could be arrived at.

The reasons that a man looks at while desiring to marry her are innumerous. However, a few of them top the list in order of priority. For most men, the need of a woman in life is necessitated by the motherly love that he had received in his early life. He needs a woman who can show him the same love and who could fulfill his physical and emotional needs. That is why many men look for the same qualities in a woman that their mothers possess. The second reason is to have a lifetime companion, who can share his desires and needs. The third reason is love. When a man feels that he loves a particular woman, he wants to own her fully. This might appear to be a wrong reason but that is the way humans are made. Everybody likes to possess what he or she desires and human relationships are no different. In some cases, the man might marry a woman because she has become pregnant and is carrying his child. Certain men wish to marry a woman who is having the same career as his, so that they would be able to adapt to each other better. It is quite usual for a doctor to marry a doctor and a lawyer to marry a lawyer. They would be able to understand the work pattern and the workload of each other. However, few others are very particular that the woman is having a different profession, so that their interests do not clash. This choice depends on the outlook of the individual.

In short men marry women for the following main reasons.

  • The wish to continue the motherly love received in childhood.
  • Desire to have a lifetime companion.
  • The love the man has for the woman.
  • The woman having become pregnant by him.
  • To have a woman who has a similar career for easier adaptability.

Women also marry men for nearly the same reasons. However, one important reason that women have in marriage is to escape from parents that they do not like or from a parent who is abusive. Sometimes, men also marry for this reason but the number is much lesser than women. So the reasons for a woman marrying a man can be enumerated as follows.

  • Wish to escape from parents.
  • Desire to have a lifetime companion.
  • Love for the man.
  • Having become pregnant by the man.
  • To have a man having a similar career for easier adaptability.

The reasons for getting married are quite obvious. On the other hand, the reasons for not getting married are much more complicated. In fact, it would be difficult to mention reasons for not getting married. However, the reasons for a marriage becoming a failure could be discussed with more ease. There are several jokes about marriage but nearly all of them are at the expense of the woman. There should be some strong reasons for that. Probably, the main reasons are the innumerable needs that women have that drain the purse of a man and the continuous nagging that women indulge in after marriage. One joke says that a successful man is one who can make more money than his wife spends but a successful woman is one who finds such a man. Many women tend to nag the men too much after marriage. They try to compare their husbands with other men who are more successful in life, which is resented by the husbands. Wives also tend to give free advice to men as to what they should and should not do, which is also not liked by many men.

Infidelity is one more reason that could harm the institution of marriage. Both men and women, who are quite possessive, would be repelled when they come to know about extra-marital relationships, leading to separation. Physical incompatibility is the cause for break-up in several cases. Even loss of interest in sexual relationship after some time could lead to a break-up of the marriage. Finally, the conflict in tastes and interests that appeared insignificant before the marriage starts to take a larger picture in married life. Disagreements increase, resulting in final separation.

Even though it would look absurd if we list reasons for not getting married, we could list the reasons that break-up marriage.

  • Over-spending by the wife and living beyond the man?s income
  • Continuous nagging, comparing the man to others more successful, and giving unwarranted advice
  • Infidelity
  • Physical incompatibility or sharp decrease in sexual interest
  • Conflict in tastes and interests leading to disagreements and fight
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First Date Etiquette: Do?s and Don?ts for Your First Date

A first date is all about first impressions and naturally, you want to make a good one. With all the pressure and nervousness we feel before a first date, it is not always easy to realize whether the things we do on a first date will leave a good or bad impression.

Below are some Dos and Don?ts for Your First Date so that you do not give any false impressions about yourself. Whether the date works out or not, you should always be remembered as the person who was comfortable and delightful to spend some time with.
Do?

1. Make Eye-Contact
Making eye contact on a date is very important. It makes the other person feel important and that you are actually interested and paying attention to what he or she is saying.

2. Give Compliments
Be sure to give your date a nice compliment- whether it be on their hair, clothes, smile or whatever you personally notice. Giving compliments will show your date that you cared enough to take the time to observe the efforts they made in putting themselves together.

3. Laugh at His/Her Jokes
Whether you truly think your date?s jokes and sense of humor is actually funny, it is always polite to give a laugh. To laugh at his/her jokes and humor will show the appreciation you have for the efforts they made to make the date interesting. So give him/her a laugh, without being over the top or making it look fake or forced.

4. Give a Confirmation Call
Giving a quick call to confirm your date will make you both feel relaxed and peaceful. It will prevent any misunderstandings or miscommunications and will also relieve any worries about you or date being stood up. Plus, it also shows how much you are actually looking forward to meeting your date!

Don?t?
Things you should avoid on your first date!
1. Talk on the Phone
Nothing is ruder than talking on your cell phone during your date, or checking messaged constantly while on a date. It expresses only rudeness, but that you may also be bored and uninterested in your date, making him/her feel insecure and upset. So wait until the end of your date to check messages and if you must keep your cell-phone on and answer it, then keep your talk short and let the caller know that you are busy and will get back to them later.

2.Be Late
Being late for a date is more than just being late. It gives the impression that you do not respect your date?s time and that you are also someone that cannot be relied on. Show your date that you value time and are responsible by showing up on time. This a quality that everyone find attractive.

3.Talk too Closely
Do not make your date uncomfortable by getting too close to them when you talk. People need to feel like they still have their own personal space and if they suddenly feel suffocated, then they will close up and you will not be able to learn as much about them as you would like.

4.Be too Aggressive or Direct
There is a difference being flirty and being too aggressive. There is also a difference between asking questions to get to know your date better and just being too direct. If you like your date, feel to flirt and have fun, but do not be too touchy feely and do not get too sexy with your talk. You do not really know how your date feels at this point and perhaps he/she is not ready or comfortable getting that far yet. Keep your flirting simple and set limits. You can ask questions to your date about their work, hobbies and so on, but do not be too direct and forward with your questions either. For example, do not straight ask their yearly income, marriage plans and so on. Remember, this is a first date- do not scare your date away with a ?too much too soon? impression.
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When parents won't let go

You've left the family nest, but when are they going to treat you like an adult? We look at how to cope when your folks are just too in-your-face.
The scenario
For some, leaving home doesn't mark the beginning of an independent life. It's more like an escape bid that never really comes off. From unexpected calls to unwanted guidance and guilt trips, some parents really know how to make life a misery. They probably don't mean it, of course, but if it's becoming a problem then it needs to be sorted.
Often, a good starting point is to identify how they're doing your head in, and why. So, here's how they misbehave according to type:

  • Parental problem 1: Disapproval
No family agrees on everything. In many ways, a difference of opinion is a healthy thing, especially between you and a parent. It can promote a constructive debate, or highlight individual strengths. As long as it's conducted with respect and sensitivity, then your relationship is likely to thrive. In many cases, however, one parent's values can be so rigid that anything you say or do can be met with pursed lips and a heavy silence. I had the most beautiful furniture in my bedroom," says Zella, 20, whose parents expressed their disapproval more directly. Admittedly it was bondage stuff, a whipping post and a bondage chair, but they just couldn't handle it and leapt to all kinds of conclusions."
Solution
It doesn't matter how many times you tell them that you can make responsible decisions for yourself, you can't beat showing them. It might mean toughing it out while you prove that you know what you're doing, but ultimately your welfare is what drives them to have their say. If they can see you're in control of your life, they should begin to leave you alone.

  • Parental problem 2: Emotional blackmail
A parent's love is unconditional. Unless, that is, you're not co-operating when it comes to bending to their will. The 'family loyalty' card is very easy to play, and we've all been guilty of it in some shape or form, so try not to see red. You might be faced with a sense that you've let them down, or a constant trickle of repeat requests that can't fail to wear you down.
Solution
There's nothing more irritating than knowing you're being manipulated. Yes, you do need to stand up to it. The key is to do so without escalating the problem. In this situation, it's often best to agree to whatever you're being asked to do, but then raise the bigger issue at a time when you're both calm and collected. If you can avoid the problem, you'll get results.

  • Parental problem 3: Favouritism
It's easy to say that parents love their children equally, but the fact is such love can be displayed in ways that leave you feeling overshadowed. It might be a form of emotional blackmail, in order to get you to comply, but it can also eat into other aspects of your life.
Solution
You might find the best person to approach about this isn't the offending parent, but the sibling who's earned their special attention. If they aren't already aware of what's happening, hopefully you'll get their support and understanding. You're adults, after all. What's more, a quiet word from them could well wake up your mum or dad to the fact that you don't deserve this kind of treatment.

  • Parental problem 4: Sulking
The first time I said I had other plans for Christmas," recalls Lise, 22, Mum's voice just went shrill and I knew I had messed up. She wouldn't admit it was a problem, but it left me feeling really guilty."
Solution
Be big about this. Swallow your pride and talk the issue through with them - preferably face-to-face. Don't feel obliged to apologise for something you're not sorry about, but ask them to look at the bigger picture. The last thing that either of you want is to allow a small fallout to grow into a long-term stand off in which you're effectively divorced from your parents.

  • Parental problem 5: Phone bothering
Only you can say how often you like to stay in touch with a parent. It might be every day, once a week or less than that. What matters is that you're both happy with the frequency, and know a good time to call. For example, not before the alarm clock goes off, or half a dozen times in the same evening.
Solution
If you've made it clear that calling in the morning or at work is not good for you, consider letting your answer machine shield all calls for a while. They'll soon get the (unspoken) message. Alternatively, for repeat offenders, make the effort to call them at a convenient time during the day, and cover every subject then. If they're in the habit of ringing back straight away, don't pick up the phone. It may be blunt, but you need boundaries.
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Mending a broken heart

Feeling broken hearted is just about the worst pain in the world. It can also seem endless - luckily it isn't.

So, you're nursing a broken heart? What you have to remember is that you can get through it. Ask around and you'll find that loads of people you know have had their hearts broken. Most of them are OK now. And one day you'll be OK too. Better than that you'll be fine. But right now, it's hard to believe that.

  • First love
Getting over your first love is incredibly difficult. This is because we all think our first, real, wonderful, romantic love will last forever. Funnily enough, we don't look at our friends and their early relationships and think that they will last forever. And we know statistically that most people do not fall in love at 17 or thereabouts and stay with that person for life. But knowing these things does not seem to stop us from feeling that our particular first love is golden and timeless and unlike any other. So when it ends it's shattering.

The only comfort is that this romance has shown you how much love you have to give. And people with love to give are attractive individuals that others are drawn to. One day, you'll look back at your first love and realise that it was a great dress rehearsal for subsequent relationships. But you're unlikely to feel that right now.

  • Treat yourself gently
You can feel so 'knocked' after your heart is broken that you feel seriously ill, or as if you've been in a car crash. So, treat yourself as if you are recovering from a bad illness or a road traffic accident. Let other people care for you, too. Get as much sleep as possible. Eat lovely foods. Convalesce. And allow yourself to cry - even if you're a bloke. It's horrible at the time, but you'll feel better afterwards. All in all, take life gently - you've had a shock, and your mind and body need time to get over it.

  • Pep up your social life
Your friends will help you get over it. Soon, they'll be asking you to come out in a group to the cinema or the pub or whatever. At first you won't be in the mood, but soon you'll realize that there are some bonuses to being single again. In fact, you'll find that this is a good time to do stuff that you didn't do with your ex. So now you can go to the sorts of films that you like, or you can listen to your type of music, or go on your type of holiday.

  • Look back to look forwards
Once you're over the stage of feeling shocked and ill, try to look back at your relationship as it really was, not through the rose-tinted spectacles you've worn for so long.
Write a list of the things that you don't miss about your ex. At first you'll be thinking that you loved everything about this person, but you didn't. What about those awful jokes, the rows, how you always had to make the arrangements if anything was to get done, the times when your ex put you down or made you feel stupid or how they didn't like your best mate? There are always elements to our past loves that weren't right, and this is a good time to focus on them.

  • Starting again
Sometimes when our hearts are broken we want to find someone new to love us as soon as possible. This is natural - but unwise. Your best bet is to embrace your single life wholeheartedly for six months or so. Obviously you may end up having sex with other people - but do make sure it's safe sex. However, your emotions are not going to settle for quite a while, so have fun, but don't go looking for anything else serious until you're happy without your ex. You'll know you're getting over your heartache when you can get through a whole day without thinking about them.
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Signs of a Husband That Wants a Divorce

I recently received an email from a woman who said she was feeling severe distance from her husband. She asked me to tell her the "signs" that would warn her that her husband wanted a divorce. I answered by explaining that while I could give her some common behaviors that men exhibit when they "check out of a marriage," all men are different and all men have a different level of personal commitment. What would be unbearable to one man and warrant a divorce may be seen as just something to work on for another. With that said, in this article, I will discuss warning signs that a husband often gives off or exhibits when he has emotionally checked out of your marriage. Whether this means he wants a divorce or not, will depend upon your husband's level of commitment. Then, I will tell you how to respond to these warning signs to repair or save the marriage or make it stronger.

  • Warning Sign Number One: Communication / Conversations Are Shorter And Less Frequent:

Emotionally exiting a marriage is probably one of the more deadly precursors to divorce. One very noticeable symptom of this is the break down of intimate, meaningful conversation. You'll notice that the length of phone calls or talks are shorter and that you generally talk about passive, small talk type topics. Less flirting or light hearted exchanges take place.

You spend less time discussing your feelings, hopes, and dreams and fill your discussions with only the things that need to be discussed or negotiated at the present time.
Of course, marriage is full of things you have to talk about with respect to running a household and for some, raising children, but a red flag should go up if that's all you are talking about.

  • Marriage Problem Signal Number Two: You're Spending Less Time Together:

This usually happens so gradually it can be hard to notice or appreciate the full impact of it. But, when significant distance in a marriage is brewing, often people will subconsciously set up being too busy or having too many obligations to fully engage with their wives on a regular basis. Going out just to spend time together or have fun together will become less and less frequent. And, when these things do occur, the atmosphere seems strained, rather than being light hearted and fun.

  • Big Tip Off Number Three: A Noticeable And Repetitive Lack Of Intimacy:

I'm not just talking about sex here, although this can be a big tip off. You'll likely also notice less hand holding, less thoughtful, intimate stares and gestures, less light hearted hugs, or less thoughtful gestures meant just because or to show you that your husband loves you. Almost always, sex is less frequent or intense as well.

Now, of course there are times when you have obligations and stressful periods where intimacy takes a back seat. But married couples who are deeply in love and very much committed to their marriage find a way to make the time for intimacy as often as they can.

  • What To Do If You're Seeing Any Of These Signs That Convince You That Your Husband May Want A Divorce:

The best thing to do if you suspect that there is a significant distance in your marriage or if your husband is not as happy in it as you'd like him to be, is to put these feelings on the table. It's better to bring these feelings into the light than to leave them in the dark and hope they'll just go away. Tell your husband you've noticed a distance and you want to work on making it better. Ask for his input as to how you can make this happen. Educate yourself on methods you can use to make your marriage stronger.

  • If You're Husband Has Or Will Ask For A Divorce Or You Think It Is Too Late:

The truth is, it's never too late. And if you are feeling (even slightly) that your husband is unsure about the marriage and wants a divorce, then something is off, whether your suspicions are completely accurate or not. Use this as a wake up call to take action.
And, if you think about it, you already know how a happy relationship with your husband feels. I'd be willing to bet that when you were first dating, both of you lavished a great deal of attention, affection and time upon each other. The result was likely very strong feelings of love, affection, satisfaction, and commitment.

When people are deeply in love, it greatly affects how they feel about themselves. They feel attractive, confident, intelligent, and on top of the world.
Of course, our obligations get in the way of this eventually. We have to turn our attention to our jobs, children, aging parents, responsibilities, etc. This is understandable and every one does it. But, making a committed attempt to being conscious of the cues and signs going on in your marriage can greatly help with this and prompt you to invest more time in it.

It's important to understand that a husband (and a wife too for that matter) who is getting his needs meet and experiencing the positive feelings about themselves that I mentioned earlier is going to be a lot more committed to staying in the marriage and to making it work because the feelings it elicits are positive and pleasurable. Your job then, is to return the positive feelings to your marriage without being entirely obvious about it. This will in turn return the commitment, affection, and empathy that are needed for a happy marriage.

If your husband is extremely distant and not receptive to you, you'll have to move more slowly and take tinier baby steps, but the process is the same and is never impossible. It's never too late, too hard, or too inconvenient to save your marriage. You already laid the foundation when you were dating. If you play your cards right, you can reestablish these behaviors to jump start your marriage and return the positive feelings that will make it reciprocal on both sides.

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Characteristics a Good Man

When you meet someone you really like, it is important to know the characteristics of a good man, so that you can quickly identify them, and not waste time on the wrong person.
The first thing that you should look for is integrity and character. These are traits that are essential in a lifelong partner.

Characteristics of a good man will tell you what he stands for, the values he lives by, and the morals that shape his behavior. This determines how he treats you and how he treats himself. His personality is important, however, do not mistake his personality with his character. His personality is the way he presents himself to the world, the way he expresses himself on the outside. His character is what he is on the inside, his substance.

In order to know how to recognize characteristics of a good man, you have to get to know him and had serious conversations with him, and this comes with time.

If you find a man who is committed to growing and improving himself as a person, that he wants to learn everything he can about being a better person, this is a characteristic of a good man.

If he is open emotionally and open with his feelings and he expresses those feelings to you. You should feel that the door to his heart is open.

Is he mature and responsible? This means that he has grown up and does not act like a child, and expecting you to take care of him. Being responsible means he does what he says he is going to do. He keeps his promises and shows up on time.

Does he have a positive attitude toward life? Does he see good in the world in you and himself? He should make you feel good when you are with him. Steer clear of the man who is a negative person who is always complaining. This type of person will drain all your energy and bring you down.

Does he have a high self-esteem? Does he feel good about who he is and how he lives his life, and takes care of himself? A man can only love you if he loves himself. He does not allow other people to mistreat him or you.

Does he have integrity? Can you count on him to be truthful with you at all times? Is he honest with himself and you? Honesty and integrity are crucial for a long term relationship to last. You want to respect the way he treats other people.

In order for you to know the characteristics of a good man, you need to possess these same qualities. It is important to love a man not only for exterior appearance but for who he is on the inside as well.
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Powerful Signs of Male Attraction - How to Tell If a Guy Likes You

Knowing the signs of male attraction could help you find the perfect guy. Regardless of your situation, once you know the signs, you'll be able to tell if a guy likes you. So, what I'm going to share with you are some signs of male attraction that will help you find your true love.

However, I will tell you that alot of the signs I'm going to discuss are things guys do subconsciously to show you affection. And most guys wouldn't admit to what I'm about to share with you.
Well, the signs of male attraction are:

  • Love Taps
    If a guy teases you or "picks" on you, he's attracted to you. He may "play fight" with you or joke around with you alot. If you pay close attention, he's actually flirting with you.
  • Friends and Family
    Another sign of male attraction is if a guy introduces you to his family and friends. When a guy introduces you to his family and friends, he's seeking the approval of you from people whose opinion he value. He wants an honest opinion of what his family thinks.
    He's also showing you that you're important to him. When a guy introduces you to other people, besides getting an approval or opinion of you, he's also showing you off. He likes you alot and wants people to know.
  • Let's Hangout
    If a guy always ask you out, he's attracted. He may not ask you out on a date, but if he wants to go to the movies, out to eat, or just hangout with you, he likes you. He enjoys being around you, talking to you, and feel that he wants to get to know you better.
    If he doesn't let you know he likes you and wants a relationship with you, he may be shy or just waiting for the right time.

These are a few powerful signs of male attraction. Pay close attention to these signs and you'll know if a guy likes you or not, which will help you find your true love.

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Build the Relationship of Your Dreams

Building the relationship of your dreams requires work. Work is one word an average individual sees or hears about and cringes away considering the mindset we have developed about it- sweat, grime, exertion, tiredness, time, etc.

Specific areas where work is needed in the relationship are as follows:

1. Affirm and appreciate your partner- this is so seeing that you are the first priority where your partner is concerned. You are not only special, you are also unique and any word of complement, appreciation, commendation and at times rebuke is well taken and equally treasured by your partner.

2. Share the glories and challenges faced together- going into a relationship among other things is primarily for intimacy. You get to be open, bare and vulnerable before your partner no matter the circumstance or occasion. Getting to share your glories and challenges not only creates room for discussion(s), it presents the opportunity for your partner share in your 'world' because he/she cares.

3. Go out on a date- taking your partner out on a date adds to the 'magic' of the moment. The two of you will get the opportunity to spend time in each other's company away from 'home' and distractions. This need not be expensive where either of you decides to make a purchase or payment for a good or service rendered (snacks, gift, movies, stroll, transport fare, cruise, etc) while out on your date.

4. Invest positively and creatively- a lot of individuals involved in a relationship make the mistake of not investing positively and creatively in it. Some only see and sit in judgement over their partner's shortcomings and faults whenever the opportunity presents itself.
Others have ended up with the assumption that they do not really need to do anything per se seeing the relationship (from their own perspective) is stable. In many instance, this state and frame of mind has caused many relationships having prospects to wither and die off somewhere along the journey.
Each individual 'having had or caught a glimpse of the partner's like and dislikes' needs to be proactive and strive to outdo one another (under a healthy atmosphere, of course) in good and ideal things that will enable the relationship to flourish to the delight of both parties concerned.

5. Develop yourself and be disciplined- There is one thing that life confronts you with at every turn of the moment and that is change. You cannot afford to remain stagnant. You must improve on yourself and strive to bring out the best to your nature and personality.
This not only boosts your self esteem making you feel good about yourself (not in a conceited manner anyway), it brings a reassurance and a comfort to your partner that you are also making effort to improve.
Being disciplined talks about feeling the need and making the effort to equally work at making your relationship succeed through the choices (this should be good and right ones please) you make from time to time and not leaving the entire responsibility to making your relationship work and succeed at the sole discretion of your partner.

6. Set Goals- You will need to set goals and focus on achieving them in order to be able to score and grade the level of your involvement and development in your relationship. Without goals or objectives, your relationship will lack a bearing/direction and over time will stagnate. Endeavor to set achievable goals and set time limits in which to assess your development and growth in your relationship.

Your relationship can only succeed when both of you make out time and take turns to invest and nurture it. Both parties involved should be encouraged to put into practice all these points shared on how to build the relationship of your dreams.
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